USMNT Spotlight: The Unbearable Blandness of Nike’s New World Cup Kits

USMNT Twitter is waking up with a collective groan today as Nike reveals the new World Cup kits we already knew about and hated.

The Swoosh’s plans for USMNT WC22 fits leaked online weeks ago, leaving US fans more frustrated than usual.

Why Nike, a company more than capable of making super cool jerseys, stuck the US with these bland vanilla cupcakes is a mystery to Stars and Stripes faithful.

Does Nike want the US to lose?

Here’s a cool USMNT jersey Nike made for LaLiga team Atletico Madrid:

Obviously, we can’t just rip Atleti’s look, but come on, Phil Knight – you can at least use them for inspiration.

No Stars, No Stripes, No Nothing – This year’s World Cup kits are almost as dumb as Puma’s WC jerseys.

Even if we still can’t beat Ghana in the round of 16, at least our jerseys will be fractionally more stylish.

The white home jerseys look incomplete, like a half-assed art project Nike only turned in because they had to. The blue away kits are marginally better, but again – where’s the creativity? Why no more effort? These things look like warm-up shirts, and ugly ones at that! The Boys will exert maximum effort to win the ultimate prize – so why didn’t Nike just try a little harder? 

Nike had eight years to Just Do It, and they Just Didn’t.

The USMNT will have to defy all odds to win the Cup looking like this. But if anyone can do it, it’s Uncle Sam’s Army.

Watch for the Stars and Stripes 26-man roster to make these ugly kits look pretty in their World Cup friendly against Japan on September 23.

Featured Image: Pexels/DS stories/USSoccerFederation/DM

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